Do This While Going NO Contact [After a Breakup]
Many people know that "Going No Contact" is a smart move when dealing with a narcissist. But what else should you do to break free from their manipulative web?
After a few breakups with narcissistic men, I've realized that just going no contact isn't enough.
Here's what you can do instead of dwelling on the sadness and grief, constantly checking your phone, or replaying the past.
These 7 things have helped me maintain No Contact and create the space I need to reflect and recharge and also get clarity on how I am really feeling and what I really want to be more on the offensive rather than the defensive should he reach out to me:
- Feel the Pain & Face the Feelings - Write down any aha moments or memories, and allow yourself to feel the emotions that come up.
- List What You Don't Like - Be brutally honest about the person or the relationship. This is where you validate your own red flags and gut feelings that you've been ignoring.
- List What You Like or Love - Acknowledge the good things to maintain a balanced perspective. This helps you stay grateful without letting emotions cloud your judgment.
- Focus on Self-Care Goals - Identify immediate, attainable self-care goals and work on them.
- Seek Outside Input and Wisdom - Talk to close friends, a counselor, or read a relevant book. Spend time in prayer or the Bible to gain clarity, confidence, and confirmation about your decision and next steps.
- Pray for Him and Write Unsent Letters - Praying for his well being and care can help you forgive and let go of any unresolved anger or bitterness you carry towards him. It also is a way for you to love him from afar if you are feeling like you want to reach out. Writing letters (that you won't send) can also help you process your feelings.
- Define what you need to see or do to before considering reconciliation - Don't let your feelings lead you back to him just to ease the pain. Use this time and space to reflect on what you truly need and want to feel safe, seen, and heard in this relationship. Be honest about these needs and be prepared to share them if necessary.
By doing these things, you can not only avoid potentially opening the door to unhealthy interactions with him, but you are also taking proactive steps to reclaim your life and start moving forward with confidence and more clarity about what you really want. ♥
Take charge of your journey out from your toxic romantic relationship!
Grab your copy of my No Contact Tracker & Narcissistic Traits Playbook now to stay committed to your No Contact Strategy.
Take good care of your heart!
Rachelle Suzanne ♥
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